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when i was young (and full of hope), i wanted to be a doctor. i was 7 years old and i knew i wanted to be a surgeon. i remember setting up a "laboratory" in the house, which is basically just a table that housed my collection of dead (sometimes barely alive) insects.
i grew up, went to school, and upon reaching seventh grade i had changed my dream. i loved courtroom drama and so i wanted to be a lawyer. coincidentally, dad wanted it for me too. nevermind the 10 years of "college". nevermind the thick books. nevermind the low pay.
kung may katwiran, ipaglaban mo!
however, hormones raged and the my heart was taken by HS biology (the subject or the teacher? hmmm). again, i wanted to be a surgeon BUT NOW with a biology pre-med course. nevermind the 10000 chem units. nevermind the cadaver. nevermind the fact that there was a hundred thousand students also wanting to get into UP. young love at its best. :)
but things turned around once more and suddenly, i am a HS junior. immersing in school politics, hating it and loving it at the same time, i began to see myself back in the courtroom. having the benefit of some expert advice, i was torn: civil law or corporate law? again, nevermind the thick books. nevermind the mortality rate. nevermind the fact that while most of my friends will be money-earners after 4 years of university, ill be stuck in the law school still getting an allowance.
before going to senior year i wanted very much to be soldier. but, unlike the other two dreams, there was not one "nevermind". it was a case of "lack in parental support". pfffft. while my heart sang "follow meeeeeee", i made up my mind. case closed.
graduation day on holy tuesday came and went.
enrolled into the Ateneo on the Easter Monday of 2002. dorm-ed for 4 years in two different places, made friends, got into trouble, made more friends, met great friends. hated people, liked people, made papers, read papers. walked, ran, rode on jeepneys and trains, drove people crazy, drove myself crazy. been in love, out of love, in love again, and then just in lust. :)
hala, college Senior na. tick tock tick tock. and all i want now is a career that will pay my own space (yebah!), car (wohoo!), night outs and dine outs, out of town trips, out of the country trips [ehem ehem], my brother's education *yikee*, and my parents' whims *yikeeeeeee*
if i was to be surgeon, id be trying out for med schools by now.
same goes for the lawyer part, except ill be scouting for law schools (duh).
the Phil Air Force would've been waiting for my arrival in june.
but no. im not gonna have a "Dr." or an "Atty." (sorry dad) before my name though i would've liked a "2nd Lt." maybe someday i'd have a "Hon." or "Her Excellency", or heck, even "Sr." *shudder* or "Rev. Mother" *shuddershuddershudder* of whatever congregation that would open their arms to me. lalabas muna sila lahat dun sa kumbento bago ako pumasok. haha.
i do have *some* regrets, and my share of moments. im actually having one right now. im thinking of the people i called God's Reasons Why I Wasn't Meant to be a Soldier. there's so many of them, and i smile at the thought of their smiling faces.
TO ALL OF YOU: THANK YOU.
i can't think of anything more to say. hmmm. i love you? pwede din, kung ikaw si...ano :p
haha. have a great great day. :D
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