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i deliberately postponed the story-telling to give way to the demanding thesis workload. :D so...its been a week since we went to bilibid. it was such a very enriching experience of going inside the prison compounds, seeing familiar facades (sorry, inside joke), and maaamong mukha (sorry, inside joke again).
sabi nga ng taga-loob, "lahat ng nasa labas, meron dito...pwera lang kalayaan namin."
i can't quite put into writing what had happened in those three days. its one of those times when i am at a loss for words. all i know is that i felt as if my whole being was consumed by everything i saw and felt, and that it will leave a permanent mark in my life.
its been a week but i still feel a tug in my heart whenever i see the simple woodwork i bought inside the maximum security compound. or when i see kuya elly's (my foster father) family picture in my phone. im still moved to tears when i remember the prisoners' faces, my foster family's smiles and laughter, and the death row building. much as i would like to look (and maybe share a smile) with a death row prisoner, i cannot overcome my fear of remembering how they look like and eventually see them on tv on the way to the lethal injection chamber.
and so il leave it this way. mabigat ang karanasan, pero masarap. at masaya na rin. ganito talaga sa mundo, hindi pwede makuha lahat. tulad sa loob, lahat na nandito. pero sa maraming paraan, marami pa ring kulang. marami pa ring inaasam.
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