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the last paper has been submitted, the last orals delivered, the last defense performed. pffft. my four years of college has come to an end. :D
much as i would like to write about how it feels to be finally, genuinely free of academic obligations, im simply not in the mood. instead, i thought about 7 people who will remain anonymous throughout this post to receive some of my sentiments. :)
person # 1 :: what would i ever do without you? i will never look at another bulletin board without thinking of you and the ideas that we had during those times we spent talking about many things. we have made roads for ourselves, a task that we had feared from the start, yet became a journey of what we had always envisioned our lives to be. you have made me realize how important it is to stay attune with myself. you told me that time does not heal wounds...for wounds would only heal if we want them to. i will always remember that. and, with all the affection and mushiness in the world, so will "you be missed".
person # 2 :: i've always thought of you as someone to be admired. four years have passed and nothing has changed. i've come to know you, your strengths and your quirks, and you've only proved to me that things aren't always what they seem. some people may judge you, but know this: they will never get to see what a really nice person you are. they just stripped themselves of the chance. my college life would've been really dull without you. salamat. marami akong natutunan sa'yo.
person # 3 :: color is what you brought into my life when i was enchanted by your smile. unknown to you, i had a thing for smiles like yours...very much similar to the smile of the one i loved. speaking of love, i was asking myself, did i love you? maybe i did. but for some strange reason i can't reconcile the fact that i barely know you yet i have been thinking if i did love you. i wish you knew how i would spend many hours into the night just thinking of how to get over this seemingly wrong emotion, but waking up the next morning feeling as though i have lost to myself. i wish i could tell you how many times i have tried to tell you how special you are to me...(well, i actually did, once, but i claimed it as a joke even before you realized what i said) and so now i ask, why am i thinking of you? wala lang.
person # 4 :: for a while there i doubted if i should include you in the list. but why not, right? you've given me so many things to think about in a very short span of time that i actually thought if you were purposely doing it to piss me off. and guess what? you did. but i've come to my senses not to spend energy into something that i may regret. you forgot how wild my imagination can go. i guess you also forgot how i would have strong intuitions that very rarely went wrong. but then i was wrong about you too. it's one of those feelings that i had that I WISH i was wrong about. but guess what? i wasn't.
person # 5 :: ive always wondered why i never thought about you the way im thinking of you now. maybe it was the friendship that blinded me from seeing how special you are. but it was also this friendship that made me see you in a different light. ironic. i guess its too late now to do anything about it...though i am playing with the thought of giving you the blue rose on march 22. haha...it makes me smile when i think about how you will react to that. what's funny is the idea that if i push through, i know you will never let me forget it.
person # 6 :: in you, i found my "niche". we started out as common faces back in freshman year, but continued to become acquianted until such time that i already called you a comrade. you were part of many (too many, i daresay) schemes that i had, and maybe more to come in the following years. i sure wouldn't have traded you for another, yet the thought would cross my mind whenever i am in one of my moments when my animal instincts take over and i just want to kill. but hey, i guess it happens to everyone (or, does it?). im just glad that despite the things we have gone through, you and i remain solidly grounded, maybe not to each other, but still, within each other.
person # 7 :: i am glad to say that i am myself when im with you. i never had to hide anything, not even my deepest imperfections and weirdness, since i know from the start that you would not judge me. you've taught me how to let go of the simple things...to mind only what i think i should mind, and give myself the chance to see beyond what is in front of me. you've become such a huge fixture in my life that i wouldn't even want to think of the time that id have to "let you go". but if such time will come, i would surrender my resistance. after all, your happiness is also mine.
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