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i had a perfect day. i woke up feeling good about myself and the world...no work or deadlines to worry about, no bills, no unpleasant surprises...just me and everyone i love, laughing, having a good time...not thinking of whether anything is right or wrong. i read a good book or watch a nice movie. i smile for no particular reason, eat as if cholesterol never existed. i look at each person so lovingly without any hesitation or fear of baring my soul.
and then someting pops my bubble, and i see myself on my bed, woken up by the alarm clock (also known as my cellphone). it's a new day and i have deadlines to meet, meetings to attend, clients to please, and time to run after. i have bills to pay, spreadsheets to update, bathrooms to clean, and clothes to wash.
but when i return to that vision of my perfect day, all the worries of today seem to vanish...and for a moment there, a very special moment...i say to myself that it's gonna be a great one. and i actually smile and believe it.
i wake up everyday feeling like a kid who's gonna be thrown into a bottomless pool and teach myself how to swim. no manuals, no practice, no coaching, no lifeguard. and just when i begin to feel muscle cramps from trying to keep my head afloat, i hear splashes of water. i see the other kids with me. different sizes, different faces, yet still kids...also thrown into the same pool, struggling to learn how to swim. we all know nothing about swimming, but what can we do? we love the water.
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"my parents tell everyone they meet that their son is a surgeon, like it was some sort of an accomplishment. i wish they could see me now." -- dr. george o'malley, grey's anatomy
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